Mind in a whirl...

lousy long week we all had....faced fridays twice a week and it...well, nearly wiped us all out, tired and shagged.....

night study is like practically having biscuits and milo...yucks...getting sick of biscuits alr....hopefully got bee hoon next week man....always feeling hungry after a few hours, like right now zzz.....

sigh, mind is all filled up with thoughts here and there....how long can I keep up this endurance???
seriously thinking that I'm thinking too much....people's comments, remarks...omg....why am I feeling so pissed just after a short remark?!
temper has been of a very short fuse lately....guess that's stress, hard to manage and control...esp to keep the stupid peace around me, not blowing up in the process, can I just tahan and tahan and tahan for the rest of my life at this rate!?
somehow i thought that i should just shut the hell up and not say a bloody word next time isn't it? that way i dun have to face comments that can trigger that short fuse so easily, life will be SO much better if I keep mum and nod my head involuntarily whenever the teacher is teaching....sensitive I am, but sometimes I just feel like saying this:

THINK before you even speak in the first place, even if it pisses you off or whatever you feel

that way we can all avoid these kind of unnecessary thinking and misunderstandings

you can say that I need to change here, of course, but that takes time, I can't change myself instantly or quickly like a chameleon changing its skin colour to suit other ppl
I'm gonna be like someone adapting to other ppl's needs and desires so quickly that I don't know who I really am
nowadays, I dunno why, but I just feel like blowing up to let ppl know my firm stance on some things...fine, 'don't make your problem my problem' or 'not my problem' , some would say, but that says a lot of things (go figure), because that is really insulting, especially to me, it's like as if I'm just an idiot trying to talk aimlessly, wtf do you want?!

Watch what you say around people, it may be your individual right cause it's your damn mouth, but not everyone can be all nice and take your words lightly and not to heart, we just don't show it in your face, we don't want things to turn ugly, in which at that moment, life just sucks


I'm only pissed off at ppl's actions or words here, not the people themselves (let me make my stand here clear, so it will avoid any unseen potential misunderstandings)
I don't want to dislike people over a few small comments, that's not fair to them at all

what I'm told to do, I'll tell myself two words: 'Heck care' (a nicer way to put it) and move on damn it!!!!!


need to clear my messed up mind about these redundant thoughts as this will really put myself in a negative light, being distracted and affected such that it will affect my concentration....
looking back at what I wrote, it seems that I'm getting more scary, cause I don't show my negative feelings that explicitly, I just take it in, and when I'm elsewhere, that's when the 'dark' side of me shows, like here....
there's seriously no other way to release my anger, playing games to release stress won't work here, they're virtual and it only satisfies you just so much, as losing yourself in the game is as good as losing your mind and sense of differentiating reality and the virtual world (schizophrenic much?)
esp since the As are less than a 100 days away, and with more work to do, games are not really of muchhelp and has become more time-consuming...but that doesn't mean that it's all work, no play...work-life balance

I've still got a lot to say, but that's enough for now already. I'll take those words in and not to heart, I'll do what I can to do that, because it's really hard for me to just forget like that, that's just me, respect that and things will be fine, no problem, comprendo?


ok, it's really late now, gonna have to go back to school for the Nanyang Concept Test, and also see some potential Uni courses that are of interest...bye....